Where are you from?

A couple of months ago we hosted two actors from a traveling drama group. I asked them both where they were from. One gave a clear answer, 'Dudley, England'. The other one, just didn't want to say and finally said, 'My parents live in Dudley.' I was curious about this, so later when the chance arose I asked him about where he had lived. Then it came out that his family had lived for 7 years in Canada.

My children also have the curious issue of not really knowing what to say when they are asked the question. I sometimes think it is really a question of what are they really asking? Do they really want to know it all. I remember taking my son Eliot to football practice. As I was walking back to the car I heard the the coach tell the kids to introduce themselves and tell each other 'where they were from'. I could hear Eliot telling the little boy across from him, 'my parents are american, my sister was born . . . my other sister was born in . . . and my parents . . . ' What an earful. He answered the question alright!

I guess it's such an emotive question because we link so much identity to places. But if you've grown up in several different cultures you don't have the same links as someone whose family has lived in the same place for generations. When people ask me where I'm from I have to remember that my accent has already betrayed me and is a clue to what is actually being asked. But for my children, they can simply answer, 'I live in Llandudno, but my family comes from America.' Because they have the local accent no one has a clue that they aren't really 'from here'.

What do you think? Do you have any great tips on helping children answer awkward questions that don't have clear simple answers?